Wednesday 31 December 2014

Need to backup your computer

I have just read a sad posting on Facebook written by a friend who has lost her photos on her computer. I am constantly surprised by the number of people who never backup there computer/ipad/phone etc. All mechanical/electrical things eventually fail. So please make sure that your data is backed up.

Friday 19 December 2014

Still trying to find Gus and Pam!

We (or rather I) lost our address book in 2013. We are still trying to find the address/phone number/email for Gus (Angus) and Pam MacConnachie. They live in Broughty Ferry just outside Dundee. If anyone can help me in my quest I will be extremely grateful.
Happy Christmas
Barry and Julia

Thursday 11 December 2014

Christmas Letter from the Mellish Family

Dear all,
We are running later than intended this year so it will be a blog post for our 2014 Christmas Letter. In may ways 2014 was a brilliant year. Not quite up to the standard of 2013; but then it would be hard to beat the birth of our first grandchild - Henry Thomas Reynard Mellish; my ordination and Helena's wedding to Sam. But we did try!
There were two major highlights; firstly the ITSO Reunion in San Jose - this was the group that I worked in when I was on assignment in California. There were about 80 of us from 18 countries. We decided that as it may be our last trip to the States we would make a proper go of it. So we started with five days in Boston and then flew over to San Jose for the reunion. After the reunion we went to Lake Tahoe for a few days staying with Joan and Bruce then to Yosemite for four days. Then back to San Jose staying with Tim and Pat. We met up with nearly all of our American friends who treated us like royalty. We had  a fabulous time.

Julia in Boston

Barry showing the Americans how to throw tea overboard!

The sea at Monterrey

Julia with Wendy at the Reunion

Overlooking Lake Tahoe

Toulumne Meadows in Yosemite

Yosemite National Park - my idea of heaven

Julia at Sausalito



Having wondered when (if) we would go back to America we found ourselves back in San Jose in September! Having booked our June trip I was then asked to conduct a wedding service for Meredith who is one of Helena's closest friends.  So it was back once more, yippee! We had a great time. We saw more of Helena and Sam in California then we had all year in the UK. After the wedding Julia and I had a few days in Russian River Valley (Sonoma County) wine tasting. Then we joined Meredith and Jon, plus family members, plus Helena and Sam for a few days camping at Capitola Beach. Well they camped and we stayed in a hotel. It was great fun. One of the highlights was when our friends Tim and Pat took us to see the 49ers play the first game at the Levi Stadium. Sadly they lost but it was a brilliant day.
Meredith and Jon at the wedding

Helena and Sam talking to Jon

Julia at the Levi Stadium in her 49ers shirt

Northern Californian Coast

At our B&B in wine country

Helena and Sam at Santa Cruz


Waiting for a ride at the Boardwalk in Santa Cruz

The Marin Headlands with SF in the background
Almost inevitably as we get older so the number of funerals that we go to increases. Three good friends died this year and we learnt that two of our oldest and dearest friends both have prostate cancer. We are praying for them. Hopefully it has been caught in time.

All the "children' and their other halves are doing fine. Andrew and Gaew moved house early in the year. Henry continues to thrive. We do not see Lawrie, Emma and Henry as much as we would like as they live in Halesowen a three hour drive from us. Julia did get to spend a week with them when Lawrie was away in Wales helping police the NATO Conference. They came down to us in October for a few days and we took Henry to see the poppies in the Tower of London Moat. My poppy is not due until February!

Lawrie and Henry with HMS Belfast in the background

Henry with granny

Lest we forget


Almost forgot!!! I finished my Honours Degree and was awarded an Upper Second - it is in Theology and Scripture Studies. The photo was taken outside Westminster Cathedral where the degree ceremony was held. It was on the day (24th July) of our 43rd wedding anniversary.

The past 43 years have been brilliant (well I think so!)



We hope and pray that you dear reader(s) had a good 2014. Wishing you a peaceful and blessed Christmas and Peace, Prosperity and Good Health in 2015.

All our love and best wishes

Barry and Julia

Tuesday 2 December 2014

Some thoughts on the latest health warnings on excessive drinking.

Our government has implemented laws against drinking and operating vehicles, due to the danger of accidents. These laws are enforced with ruthless severity, starting with a one year ban for any infringement.
I am fully in agreement with this, and indeed now propose that these exact same laws will be applied to all those working in government and making key decisions involving the operation of that vast vehicle, the Great British economy, There is clear scientific evidence available showing that judgement is severely impaired after the consumption of any alcohol.
I therefore propose that the selling and consumption of alcohol on government property, including the House of Lords and Houses of Parliament, is immediately banned. Furthermore any politician or government employee found on government property to be under the influence of alcohol will be forthwith banned for twelve months from office without pay or benefits.
To ensure that the Law of the Land is held in the highest degree by those who make the laws, I further propose that all entering government premises have to take a breath test, and also that random checks will be performed throughout the corridors, hallways, offices and toilets of power.
Only once we have made sure that clearheaded and capable drivers sit at the steering wheel of the UK economy as it is navigated meticulously around the hazards can we rest assured that a bunch of pickled brains is not making impaired decisions and steering us deeper into the abyss.

Friday 28 November 2014

Europe has been warned

Taken from this week's Tablet (29 November 2014).  It sums up  exactly what I think is wrong with the EU.

When Pope Francis berated the European Union this week for having lost its vision, he was pushing buttons in all its 28 member states. The EU has become mired in a bureaucratic and technocratic style of governance, giving “a general impression of weariness and ageing, of a Europe that is no longer fertile and vibrant”, he told a special meeting of the European Parliament. It was in the grip of “uniform systems of economic power in the service of unseen empires”. No wonder people had lost faith in it.

Although he received a standing ovation and much praise, particularly from the more Eurosceptical members of the assembly, this papal dressing down had not been expected. The last papal address to this body, by Pope John Paul II more than two decades ago, recalled that the EU’s founding fathers had drawn on Christian faith for their inspiration. That was a legacy that had been squandered, Pope Francis said, and needed to be returned to – not least as an antidote to rival ideologies such as Islamic jihadism.

Institutions are made of people – politicians in this case – so his indictment was of the entire contemporary political class. They had to rediscover “the sacred nature of the human person”, he told them. “The great ideals that once inspired Europe seem to have lost their attraction, to be replaced by the bureaucratic technicalities of its institutions.” The Pope is well aware that this cohort of European politicians thinks it is an acceptable solution to the problem of refugees trying to reach southern Europe by boat, to let them drown as an example to others. He barely concealed his disgust when he implored them not to allow the Mediterranean to become “a vast cemetery”.

Most member states have felt the rise of disillusionment with the EU among their electorates, not least the United Kingdom where Ukip is threatening to derail the Conservative Party from which it has recently captured two seats. Most Eurosceptic sentiment, in Britain and elsewhere, is felt as a pull of the national interest against the international, of “us” against “them”. Far from supporting this appeal to national self-interest, however, the Pope is appealing for the opposite – a Europe that takes continent-wide solidarity seriously and defends the individual against the anonymous forces of the market. The shrewder politicians will understand that people want more from Europe, not less. But they do not want more of the same.

Judging from the state of the European debate in Britain, slightly less of the same is the best on offer. It is very noticeable that no politician of any party has attempted a defence of the European project on grounds of moral vision rather than of expedience. The notion of a European common good, benefiting the national interest of all its members, has vanished. Yet it was the guiding principle of the founders, and the reason, therefore, that the EU and its earlier manifestations came into existence. Without roots planted in fertile moral ground, it will be bound to wither. After the speech of Pope Francis, it cannot complain that no one warned it.

Monday 24 November 2014

The speech that was not given

This is the text of a speech that was due to be given at Christ Church college yesterday. The speech was not delivered following protests by the Oxford University Student Union Women’s Campaign.

I’m not here tonight to debate whether or not abortion should be legal – so if anyone wants to ask what should be done about abortion in cases of incest or rape please don’t waste your time. Most people accept that abortion is in certain circumstances a tragic necessity and is here to stay. No, I’m here to debate this specific motion – whether or not the abortion culture harms Britain.
I define the abortion culture as a culture in which abortion is used so often that it begins to look like it’s being treated as a regular form of contraception (which the numbers suggest) and in which there is a widespread view that it is a right, carries no risks and in fact represents some kind of liberation for the women for whom it is available. In an abortion culture, it would be controversial to near-impossible to debate the this of terminating a pregnancy – and the attempts to close down this reasonable discussion suggestions that such a culture exists.

But I think that the abortion culture actually makes certain injustices in our society worse. And anyone who truly cares about the freedom and rights of women – and that is all of us – has to be prepared to look again at the evidence of what abortion on demand does to us. And how silence on its effects harms certain minority groups.
First, the numbers. The abortion statistics for 2013 tell a grim story. There were 185,331 in that year. Of which, only 1 per cent were due to a risk of the child being born handicapped. 99.84 per cent of those carried out under Ground C of the Abortion Act 1967 were due to the “the risk to mental health of the woman” – a provision that is notoriously easy to get around. Vincent Argent, the former medical director of the British Pregnancy Advisory Service, admitted on record earlier this year that doctors routinely pre-sign abortion forms without meeting the woman. It’s worth noting, by the way, that 64 per cent of abortions take place in the private sector financed by the NHS. There is money to be made in this.
Now if you dig down deeper into those numbers you find some interesting things about class and race, which suggest that abortion is something that is found in particular concentration among particular groups. We know a lot about this in American society: the first legalised abortion clinics were heavily located in black-dominated areas and in 2012 data showed that in New York City more black women had abortions than actually gave birth. In Mississippi, African-Americans represent around 37 per cent of the population but 75 per cent of abortions. Those figures are not so dramatic in the UK because our population is more demographically homogenous. But consider this: “Black or black British” people only make up 3.3 per cent of the population but account for 9 per cent of abortions.
Some 37 per cent of all women having abortions in 2013 had had one or more before (up from 32 per cent in 2003) and around one in seven women who had abortions were actually in a relationship. This data suggests that abortion might be being used by some people as a form of contraception. This is extraordinary given that our society is saturated with messages about safe sex and given that abortion industry advocates insist that the procedure is safe, legal and rare.
So why is abortion being used in this way? One explanation might lie in a Joseph Rowntree Study from 2004 that found that girls with few educational prospects choose to keep their babies while those who planned to go to college and find work were more likely to have an abortion. In other words, certain groups of people are still having regular, unprotected sex and still getting pregnant (despite decades of education) – and what they do next is a choice framed not necessarily by personal will but by economics.
Now you might say “that’s good because it means that women exerting control over their bodies are also in control of their economic future”. But turn it on its head. What it also means is that a) certain groups are ignoring all the information about contraception and relationship advice, getting pregnant and then returning to the clinic again and again as thought it was no different to the pill. And b) it means that decisions about child rearing are determined less by genuine personal choice and more by cultural pressure. It suggests that women aren’t given serious alternatives to abortion – they’re not getting support from families or their government, but they are receiving cultural messages about the terrors and pressures of child rearing. You might take some of that message from Tory policy on withdrawing child benefit, which I would argue runs counter to their family friendly image.
While we’re talking about cultural pressure, let’s talk about the issue of disposability. Abortion on demand feeds the idea that we all deserve full autonomy and liberation from responsibility for others. That’s great for the strong; bad for the vulnerable.
Consider this strange hypocrisy. We live in a society where we care very deeply about the rights of disabled people – the backlash against the government’s welfare reforms showed that – and we’re always telling ourselves that they have a right to full citizenship. Yet we also tell pregnant women that if the child is disabled then they have a total right to abort it. The results are pretty troubling. Nine out of 10 unborn babies diagnosed with spina bifida are aborted. The proportion is about the same for kids with Down’s Syndrome. In fact, a 2009 study found that three babies were aborted every day due to Down’s.
Now, again, I’m not saying that women shouldn’t necessarily be free to make that decision. All I’m saying is that in an abortion culture, there is a bias towards choosing abortion as a mythically easy option. Peter Elliott, Chairman of The Down Syndrome Research Foundation, who has a 24-year-old son David with Down’s Syndrome, said of that 2009 study: “Why are the abortions at such a high rate unless they have been given the impression the situation was terrible and it warranted an abortion? I don’t think the choice is presented to the parents in the light of the true situation where the children have a good life and are in fact viewed as a blessing to the parents, not a curse, and I don’t think these parents getting the abortions know much about Downs syndrome at all.”
Moreover, it makes perfect sense that a culture that regards human life as disposable at one end of the lifecycle should regard it as equally disposable at other points during its cycle. That point of view was eloquently expressed in an article in The Journal of Medical Ethics by Alberto Giubilini and Francesca Minerva, who argued that newborn babies are not “actual persons” and do not have a “moral right to life” – after all they are not, like that embryo in the womb, entirely autonomous of their parents. They said that parents should be able to have their baby killed if it turns out to be disabled when it is born.
It’s perfectly natural to extend this logic to euthanasia – which has been legalised in the Benelux countries and is now being discussed seriously in Britain. Dr Joseph Fletcher, one of the godfathers of modern bio-ethics and a celebrated proponent of both abortion and euthanasia rights once reminisced fondly about about the days when he and the family planning advocate Margaret Sanger joined the Euthanasia Society of America, in order to “link the two [abortion and euthanasia] causes so to speak the right to be selective about parenthood and the right to be selective about living”. Fletcher explained, “We’ve added death control to birth control as a part of the ethos of life style in our society.” His argument was that life really has no value unless it is of a certain quality – a point reinforced by Richard Dawkins when he advised of a child with Down’s, “Abort it and try again – it would be immoral to bring it into the world”.
By the way, Dr Fletcher would have agreed. He once said that there was “no reason to feel guilty about putting a Down’s syndrome baby away, whether it’s ‘put away’ in the sense of hidden in a sanitarium or in a more responsible lethal sense. It is sad; yes. Dreadful. But it carries no guilt. True guilt arises only from an offense against a person, and a Down’s is not a person.” A horrific attitude, you might think, but not so strange really when you consider the great violence that abortion does to our very concept of personhood.
Perhaps the greatest irony of this whole phenomenon is that while abortion was supposed to give women greater autonomy, we have evidence that it was being used in England by some families to terminate pregnancies entirely because the fetus was female. In other words, abortion was being used in such a way as to validate the medieval idea that girls are worth less than boys. Happily, this abuse looks set to be officially and explicitly outlawed for the first time.
All these problems are all the more troubling for the fact that we don’t discuss them. This reflects how modern capitalist societies deal with issues surrounding poverty, suffering, abuse etc – it pushes them out of view, using medical jargon or political phraseology to cover up for a variety of problems that need to be discussed in far blunter terms.
I was not always pro-life. I became so when my historical research into the American conservative movement compelled me, reluctantly, to read pro-life literature.
I was shocked to discover how messy abortion is. How painful it can be. How there is evidence to show it having long-term psychological effects. For instance, research by Professor Priscilla Coleman published in the British journal of psychiatry argues that, “abortion is associated with moderate to highly increased risks of psychological problems subsequent to the procedure. Women who had undergone an abortion experienced an 81 per cent increased risk of mental health problems, and nearly 10 per cent of the incidence of mental health problems were shown to be directly attributable to abortion.”
Why did I not know this? Because while abortion deals trauma to our society, we deal with it by ignoring it. It’s no different to the fact that we ignore shockingly high rates of suicide in prison. Appalling standards of care in elderly homes. The abuse and rape of children in children’s services. And this is what is so doubly perverse about the abortion culture: we effectively open the floodgates on something – and then refuse to talk about its reality. Abortion is at the very centre of the therapeutic state: the state that dulls pain with simplistic solutions rather than addresses their complex causes.
And all I’m asking for here today is that we have a serious conversation about it. Thank you for listening.

Saturday 22 November 2014

"They" still don't get it!

The leaders of our main parties still do not get what is happening in the country. Maybe it is that they live in the rarefied air of the "Westminster Bubble" or perhaps it is that they have never had a real job outside the cosy world of politics and public relations. The electorate is fed up with the professional full-time politicians who ignore the wishes of the "common people". They do not listen to the few hardy souls that join the party. The latest example of which is the Labour Party bypassing local parties to parachute in candidates who are part of Ed Milliband's coterie.
It would be nice to have a few people in Parliament who have had proper jobs, who have had to live on the minimum wage for some years. Who with a spouse/partner  raise a family and had to have had to juggle three jobs between them  just to make ends meet. Then we might start getting some sensible welfare policies.
If the Tories had a few more small businessman; running a corner shop, small garage  or similar then we might have policies that actually helped people start  their own business.
Instead of which they just attract people in cast from the same mould. So what happens - the electorate vote for UKIP and cast the LibDems into the outer darkness. Half of politics is all about perception and the perception of UKIP is that they listen and care about issues that worry the "man on the Clapham omnibus". Whether this is true or false is irrelevant, it is what people believe.
So despite Polly Tonybee and her ilk on the Guardian and "call me Dave's" chums on the Telegraph the people will continue to read the Mail, the Sun, The Express and The Mirror and many will vote UKIP.

Sunday 16 November 2014

Fed up with "Christmas"!

Am I just very old grumpy (probably yes) but it is only the 16 of November and I am already fed up with the secular world's idea of Christmas. The battle of the best TV Ad, the plethora of Christmas supplements proffering a bewildering array of possible gifts that will give the recipient everlasting happiness and joy, at least until they have finished unwrapping them. Is this really what it is all about? I used to think that a pregnant woman giving birth had something to do with it, judging by the mass media I am sadly deluded.

Friday 10 October 2014

Stormy waters for the "main" political parties

The by-election results make interesting reading. I know that by-elections are not always a good guide to general election "form" as people often vote knowing that the result will not change the governing party. Whilst the result in Clacton was expected as Douglas Carswell was by all accounts a good constituency MP; the fact that UKIP came so close in Heywood and Middleton will worry the Labour party. We live in interesting times!

Monday 29 September 2014

Bishop Kieran Conry

With regard to the resignation of Bishop Kieran Conry I see that the bloggers are out in force blaming Vatican II and/or the decline in use of the extraordinary form of the Latin Mass. Throughout Church history there have been priests, bishops and popes who have fathered children and broken their vows of celibacy. There have been priests, bishops and popes guilty of heresy throughout Church history. There have been been priest and bishops guilty of sexual abuse throughout Church history. To assign errant behaviour on preferring one style of Mass over another or saying that it is the fault of Vatican II, Vatican I or the Council of Trent is to stretch credulity to breaking point. The simple fact is that we are a Church of sinners who are seeking to know Christ. All we can do and all we should do is pray for each other, that is to pray for the sinner and not condemn. I for one have too many motes in my eyes to worry about the specks in the eyes of others.

Tuesday 2 September 2014

The King Family

Bringing the weight of Southampton Hospital, Hampshire Police and the Spanish authorities to bear on a loving family desperate to save the life of their little boy, to isolate him from his family and to handcuff and detain his parents fills me with dismay and anger. This is a despicable way to treat decent people and contrasts sharply with the sickening betrayal and neglect of those 1400 youngsters in Rotherham. It's disgraceful to see soft targets bullied and coerced while awkward, belligerent ones are given an easy ride.
This has become a distorted, twisted country with warped values as, once again, we see a legal instrument, the European Arrest Warrant, sold to us on the pretext that it will bring criminals such as gangsters, terrorists and sex offenders to justice, being used instead to attack the law abiding and respectable. If this sort of nightmare can happen to the King family, it can happen to any of us.

Saturday 30 August 2014

Rotherham Child Abuse Scandal

I have heard very little as to what is being done to help the 1400+ children who were abused. They have been severely traumatised and their lives shattered. Where is the mass publicity advising them of where they can get help? They should be the number one priority, sorting out and punishing those perpetrated the crimes and those who allowed them to happen can come tomorrow. Today we need to help the abused.
Napac - the National Association for People Abused in Childhood is one charity - 0808 801 0331 is the helpline.

Friday 15 August 2014

Thought for the day

If Catholics only have mass on Sundays do they cease to exist the rest of the week?

Tuesday 12 August 2014

How on earth did we manage?

It seems that our esteemed politicians cannot survive on less than £120k per year in London. I wonder how Julia and I managed on far less than that?
http://www.theguardian.com/politics/2014/aug/11/tory-foreign-office-minister-quits-intolerable-expenses-rules

Sunday 3 August 2014

Reflection for Sunday 3 August - Feeding of the 5000

Thanks to Fr Robin Gibbons for this:

What does it mean for a Christian in fear of their life in Iraq, a Syrian Christian bombed out of home and church or a child whose whose family has been blown to bits in Gaza or somebody with the Ebola virus, to hear those words of Paul, ‘nothing can separate us from the love of Christ?’.  Would they find comfort in a pain beyond words, in a loss we can only vaguely acknowledge.
This is where pious platitudes and sentimental religion collapse, this is the point where the Christ of salvation loses his clothes and church finery, moves out of a safe sacramental world we create and becomes the bloodied Christ of the cross. The one who cries ‘ father forgive, they know not what they do!'.This is the point where the raw love of God remains our hope!
We are all complicit in the savagery of this world, we in the West have it so easy, but that cannot last.  If we follow the Lord the cross is ours to carry and transformation comes through bearing one another’s burdens.  Jesus in the Gospel sees the crowd and takes pity on them, but before he celebrates a meal with them he is active in curing the sick.  A message for us who have weekly Eucharist, that the beginning of our sacramental celebration lies with the care of real people, there the body of Christ is first encountered.  The needs of the poor, hungry, homeless come before our need for sacramental celebration which connects with our active love.
Isaiah shows us God literally calling people from want and need to life, but that, on this earth has to be through us! The scriptures are not simply pages in a book or nice poetic readings, they are God’s voice calling us to respond now!
But back to my initial question, how do people who have had far more suffering than we ever will know, who in a true sense take on sufferings far more painful than the Christ on the cross, find that love of God?
As I grow older I notice more that in the tangled mess and problems of the world, there is one thread that never snaps, somehow deep in all of this is the presence of Christ alive, loving, suffering with them.  The presence of that loving Christ is our constant loving care for these little ones!

Saturday 2 August 2014

Friday 25 July 2014

Graduation Day (and 43 Wedding Anniversary)

At last all my studies have come to an close. Yesterday (Thursday 24 July) was graduation day at Westminster Cathedral. They said that it was 300 degrees, I am not sure if that was the number graduating or the temperature inside the Cathedral. Anyway it was a great day.
After the ceremony Julia and I went with Andrew and gaew to Gymkhana, an upmarket Indian restaurant in Albermerle Street. It was a fantastic meal, subtle twist on traditional Indian food. It is not cheap, but we dined off the early evening menu which made it affordable (just). We had the matching wines and they really did go well with each dish. Highly recommended!





Surrounded by young ladies!


With the love of my life

With John Hamilton - a fellow deacon

Wednesday 23 July 2014

Caen Hill Locks

Spent yesterday with old college friends on Martin's narrow boat on the Kennet and Avon Canal at Caen Hill Locks - we do not do them all just the last 7 (there are 29 in total!) A great fun day which started with a pub lunch.







Friday 4 July 2014

More American Photos

Walking in the high country at Tahoe

View from a house that was for sale - only $10.25m

Overlooking Lake Tahoe with Joan and Bruce

Mirros Lake at Yosemite

Mirror Lake, sadly much reduced thanks to the drought.

Jellyfish at the aquarium


With the Underwoods

Our final day and only trip to San Francisco

At Sausalito

Back from the US of A

On Tuesday we returned to the UK after spending almost a month in America. The reason for the visit was a reunion of the IBM ITSO (International Technical Support Organisation) that I worked for when I was on assignment in San Jose. California. Over 80 people attended the reunion coming form 18 countries and the span of service ran from 1972 to the present day. The reunion ran for four days, starting on Wednesday 11 June and ending on Saturday 14 June. It was a great occasion and it was wonderful to catch up with friends from across the globe.
When we decided to attend we thought that we might as well make it special, as you get older you are never quite sure how health will affect travel. So we started in Boston, then flew to San Jose for the reunion, then it was off to Tahoe to spend time with our friends Joan and Bruce, then to Yosemite National Park for four nights then back to SJ spending the last four nights with our friends Tim and Pat. They put on a party for us on the final Saturday - a great event. All in all a wonderful holiday one we will remember for many years.

View form our balcony in Boston

We did a walking tour!

View of the city from the harbour

Jazz Sunday brunch in Salem

Pacific Grove - we loved going there

Julia with friends at the reunion


At the Wente winery for dinner - I was MC

View from the our friends deck at Tahoe

Joan and Bruce with Teddy and Julia

Bodie, a deserted mining town on the way to Yosemite

Overlooking Mono lake

Half Dome from Tioga Pass

In the giant sequoia's

Nevada Falls



Tim and Pat